There he goes again, kicking off his daily routine. He lethargically rises from his feather bed and slowly stretches out his back, one vertebrate at a time. He leisurely strides over into the kitchen, making his presence known to all. My mom sees him and instantaneously throws two slices of bread into the toaster oven without even thinking twice about it. He waits impatiently as the smell of browning toast wafts through the house and into his nostrils. Pop. Finally. My mom takes the two, crispy slices, which are toasted to perfection, and smears a generous amount of organic crunchy almond butter on top. Before she can even reach a plate from the cabinet, Barkley swoops in and snags his breakfast from the counter. He inhales his meal within seconds and makes his way back to the living room where I am reclining on the couch, enjoying my steaming cup of coffee. He comes quite close to me, but refuses to sit down. He stares at me fervently, as if he can see directly into my soul. I realize I have made a huge mistake. Silly, half-asleep me. I am sitting in his spot. Clearly my coffee has not kicked in yet. I make way for the king and relocate to a different couch cushion. He does not waste any time in reclaiming his throne as he swiftly pounces up and over my lap and plops himself down, nearly crushing me under his immense weight. Just when I think I am in the clear to relax, I feel his burning eyes upon me once again. However, this time they are sending a different message. He looks at me, then up at the television, and then back at me one more time. That’s all he needed to do. I get it. My turn controlling the remote is over. I flip through until I find his favorite channel - Animal Planet. I look over in his general direction, afraid to make eye contact again, but it seems that he is finally content. His eyes are glued to the screen, avidly watching the Eukanuba Tournament of Champions dog show. He licks his chops and picks up the tennis ball conveniently lying next to him on the couch. And there he sits, ball in mouth, belly full, and sufficiently entertained. I shake my head and laugh to myself - it’s Barkley’s world, and I’m just living in it.